Friday, July 14, 2006
I am the god of bad Internet forwards...
and I bring you...The Zidane Headbutt game! Some how this managed to get through the Internet "tubes" to my PC, thank you Ted Stevens.
Auburn sociology department takes up basketweaving.
Carnell "Cadillac'' Williams and other Auburn athletes received high grades from the same professor for sociology and criminology courses that didn't require them to attend classes or do much work, The New York Times reported.
Now it's no great secret to those of us in the South that Auburn doesn't have much of an academic reputation. Just 2 years ago the SACS was threatening to revoke their academic accreditation due to the pervasive influence of Bobby Lowder a booster and Auburn trustee. Lowder is so in control of Auburn, that if he were to shake an Auburn snowglobe, it would begin to flurry at Toomer's drugstore. That Lowder would encourage academic dishonesty to keep the football team strong is no great surprise. Here's what a friend of mine sent me on the matter:
Now it's no great secret to those of us in the South that Auburn doesn't have much of an academic reputation. Just 2 years ago the SACS was threatening to revoke their academic accreditation due to the pervasive influence of Bobby Lowder a booster and Auburn trustee. Lowder is so in control of Auburn, that if he were to shake an Auburn snowglobe, it would begin to flurry at Toomer's drugstore. That Lowder would encourage academic dishonesty to keep the football team strong is no great surprise. Here's what a friend of mine sent me on the matter:
Thursday, July 13, 2006
Homeland Security report cites dubious targets.
A Homeland Security department report available as a pdf file here, has petting zoos, and ice cream parlors identified as potential targets in with seaports and power plants.
The report consisted of targets submitted by each state as potential terrorist targets. The states had submitted a bean fest, an Amish popcorn company, a beach at the end of a street, a bourbon festival, golf courses, a yacht repair firm, a donut shop, a groundhog zoo and a kangaroo conservation center as just some of the dubious targets in need of protection.
Now I've been to the Kangaroo Conservation Center which is in Dawsonville, and I have a hard time imagining that any serious jihadi would consider it a worthwhile target. In addition some of the states obviously have delusions of grandeur with regards to their viability as terrorist targets.
-Indiana has submitted 8,591 targets more than any other state and close to 3,000 more than New York (5,687).
- Vermont and New Hampshire reported only 70 and 77 assets respectively.
By comparison, Wisconsin reported a hundred times as many
assets (7,146)
- 1,305 casinos, 25 golf courses, 24 swimming
pools, 44 recreational centers, 159 cruise ships and 163 water parks were reported as targets.
- Washington state lists 65 national monuments and icons, while Washington,
D.C. lists only 37.
- New York lists only two percent of the nation's banking & finance
sector assets, ranking between North Dakota and Missouri.
The problem with all this reporting is that it muddies the water and perhaps take from the urgency of protecting sites that really need it. Let's hope that DHS will discover a rash of competence and actually appropriately determine where homeland security funding should go.
The report consisted of targets submitted by each state as potential terrorist targets. The states had submitted a bean fest, an Amish popcorn company, a beach at the end of a street, a bourbon festival, golf courses, a yacht repair firm, a donut shop, a groundhog zoo and a kangaroo conservation center as just some of the dubious targets in need of protection.
Now I've been to the Kangaroo Conservation Center which is in Dawsonville, and I have a hard time imagining that any serious jihadi would consider it a worthwhile target. In addition some of the states obviously have delusions of grandeur with regards to their viability as terrorist targets.
-Indiana has submitted 8,591 targets more than any other state and close to 3,000 more than New York (5,687).
- Vermont and New Hampshire reported only 70 and 77 assets respectively.
By comparison, Wisconsin reported a hundred times as many
assets (7,146)
- 1,305 casinos, 25 golf courses, 24 swimming
pools, 44 recreational centers, 159 cruise ships and 163 water parks were reported as targets.
- Washington state lists 65 national monuments and icons, while Washington,
D.C. lists only 37.
- New York lists only two percent of the nation's banking & finance
sector assets, ranking between North Dakota and Missouri.
The problem with all this reporting is that it muddies the water and perhaps take from the urgency of protecting sites that really need it. Let's hope that DHS will discover a rash of competence and actually appropriately determine where homeland security funding should go.
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
Not moving anytime soon...
but you like the sound of popping bubble wrap. Well the internet has solved your problem! Online bubble wrap, this is time wasting material at it's extraordinary best. Try manic mode for a more explosive experience.
Seperated at Birth?
Bud Selig
Stephen Hawking
Selig seems just like Hawking, expect without the brains or the cool wheelchair. I wonder what Hawking would do about the steroid issue? Besides it would be cool to hear that computer voice making declarations about big issues in baseball like, PETE ROSE SHOULD BE IN THE HALL OF FAME. Or RAFAEL PALMEIRO IS A LYING SACK OF CRAP. Or even ASTROTURF AND THE DESIGNATED HITTER ARE BULLS***!
Optimus Prime...
A picture of the truck form of Optimus Prime has been leaked on Ain't it Cool News. Clearly Michael Bay has taken some liberties[FLAMES? Alex will no doubt love it :) ] But I still think this film has real potential. So without further gilding the lily here is Optimus Prime as he will be seen in the Transformers movie(click pic for larger image):
He's more than meets the eye.
He's more than meets the eye.
White House salaries...
The National Journal online has a list of all 433 people who work in the White House. The folks at the top recently got a $4,200 cost of living addition to their salaries. The folks on the low end of the White House pay scale, those making around $30000 a year? They got no raise. Even in his own house Bush is determined to F*** over the lower middle class.
A quick perusal of the list reveals a few of the most overpaid people in America. $114K for an ethics advisor is this White House? I don't know whether to laugh or cry. My personal favorite is $106K for Stuart Baker, whose job title is(and I'm not making this up) Director of Lessons Learned. Yes, all those decisive policy shifts; like away from the wrong war in Iraq, developing a coherent renewable energy policy, and of course the strong policy of dealing with N. Korea are clear indicators that Stuart is getting the job done.
Speaking of N. Korea, chaeck out today's Luckovich cartoon, priceless.
A quick perusal of the list reveals a few of the most overpaid people in America. $114K for an ethics advisor is this White House? I don't know whether to laugh or cry. My personal favorite is $106K for Stuart Baker, whose job title is(and I'm not making this up) Director of Lessons Learned. Yes, all those decisive policy shifts; like away from the wrong war in Iraq, developing a coherent renewable energy policy, and of course the strong policy of dealing with N. Korea are clear indicators that Stuart is getting the job done.
Speaking of N. Korea, chaeck out today's Luckovich cartoon, priceless.
Tuesday, July 11, 2006
Suri Cruise, a myth?
Noting some discrepancies from normal paperwork procedures regarding births in California, internet conspiracy theorists are beginning to wonder if there really is a Suri Cruise. What dicrepancies? Well I'm glad you asked, you see Suri's birth certificate wasn't filed until May 8th even though she was born on April 18th, well outside the standard 10 days that such a filing takes. Additionally the certificate notes the attending nurse wasn't actually in the room when the child was born and never saw the baby and yet signed off anyway. Hmm, Is scientology's crown prince pulling a fast one on us? Stay tuned.
Armageddon anyone?
A group of American evangelical pastors is launching the Billion Souls initiative, in an attempt to reach every heathen on Earth. Promise Keepers founder Bill McCartney warns that those who fail to heed Christ's message are "toast". Meanwhile Iran's fundy Islamic President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, recently stated that within two years, the Mahdi, the last of Mohammed's heirs, will return to Tehran, ushering in the ultimate grand finale Jihad on the non-Muslim world.
Now religious fanatics have been predicting the end of the world, basically since the dawn of human society. These doomsayers have universally had poorer foretelling accuracy than Miss Cleo, but they have never let that stop them from continuing to forecast the end of the human race. It's always been easy to be dismissive of such folks since they've never been right before. The times, as they say, however are a changing. The Almighty is no longer required to begin the end of all, and a true believer like Ahmadinejad could microwave large portions of humanity before one can send out their "You've got raptured" e-mail. Even more frighteningly 40 percent of folks in a recent poll done here in the supposedly enlightened US of A, believe that the End is near. Many of them in fact, are currently running our government. It can be seen in policy decisions made across the board, why save the whales the world is ending; O-zone? who cares if one has been raptured; Energy crisis? There are no cars in heaven.
Why try for peace in Israel if it's all part of God's plan? Why not welcome a global religious war between Christianity and Islam if it will get one raptured? These are the questions we face today in an ever more dangerous world that has come so far in 2000 years, and yet in some ways, has not.
Now religious fanatics have been predicting the end of the world, basically since the dawn of human society. These doomsayers have universally had poorer foretelling accuracy than Miss Cleo, but they have never let that stop them from continuing to forecast the end of the human race. It's always been easy to be dismissive of such folks since they've never been right before. The times, as they say, however are a changing. The Almighty is no longer required to begin the end of all, and a true believer like Ahmadinejad could microwave large portions of humanity before one can send out their "You've got raptured" e-mail. Even more frighteningly 40 percent of folks in a recent poll done here in the supposedly enlightened US of A, believe that the End is near. Many of them in fact, are currently running our government. It can be seen in policy decisions made across the board, why save the whales the world is ending; O-zone? who cares if one has been raptured; Energy crisis? There are no cars in heaven.
Why try for peace in Israel if it's all part of God's plan? Why not welcome a global religious war between Christianity and Islam if it will get one raptured? These are the questions we face today in an ever more dangerous world that has come so far in 2000 years, and yet in some ways, has not.
