Pop Culture Cuisinart

Check out this guys testimonial on QVC. Brings new meaning to the slogan "Dude, you're getting a Dell."

This kind of honesty on TV is refreshing, we should get this guy to comment on all sorts of topics:
George Bush: Idiot
Paris Hilton: Slut
Britney Spears: Fat, not pregnant.
Iraq War: Clusterf---
Tom Cruise: Gay
Scientology: Vacuous Nonsense

See how easy this could be!

Thanks to mcd for the linkage.

Yesterday was Steak and a blowjob day. Created a number of year's ago by some enterprising sort, steak and a BJ day occurs a month after Valentine's Day as a reaction to all the hoops we jump through for the special ladies in our lives. It's actually a good idea, it focuses on the things guys really want rather than buying some cheesy present.

I gotta mark my calender.

Former Vikings QB Daunte Culpepper was traded to the Dolphins for a second round pick yesterday. As Will Smith would say, "Bienvenidos a Miami, Daunte! Does anyone else not think this is a bad idea? This is the same man who thought a boat party with strippers was a capital idea in Minnesota. Can you imagine what's going to happen to him in Miami? With Ricky Williams as a teammate no less. This is like sending a fat man to New Orleans to live with Emeril. They will probably need a tugboat to get him out of the harbor and into training camp.

Daunte's adventure inspired clothing!

Not to mention what a horrible hosing this is for the Vikes, last year the Dolphins traded a 2nd round pick for AJ Feeley! Trading with them is like negotiating a candy deal with an infant, they should of gotten a first rounder and the deed to Pro Player park for a Pro Bowler.

but it is. For your ready to rise conservative wackos. Of course a site like this is illuminating. It explains why right wingers are so happy to start religious wars, and destroy the enviroment. All the better to bring on the Rapture! Apparently our all powerful and omniscient God needs to get his act in gear and rapture already, these people are ready to go.

A woman turns on her faucet and out pours beer. Why does this never happen to me?

And as a public service to prevent unhappy accidents, I offer all the fellas the ultimate beer goggle test, female or shemale? This is one you don't want to get wrong at the bar.

back in 2003. The memos excerpts of which are printed in the Guardian newspaper. Provide a scathing indictment of the US post invasion response in Iraq and an impressive laundry list of administrative failures.

Among the observations made in the memos:
· A lack of interest by the US commander, General Tommy Franks, in the post-invasion phase.
· The presence in the capital of the US Third Infantry Division, which took a heavyhanded approach to security.
· Squandering the initial sympathy of Iraqis.
· Bechtel, the main US civilian contractor, moving too slowly to reconnect basic services, such as electricity and water.
· Failure to deal with health hazards, such as 40% of Baghdad's sewage pouring into the Tigris and rubbish piling up in the streets.
· Sacking of many of Saddam Hussein's Ba'ath party, even though many of them held relatively junior posts.

In addition John Sawers, Tony Blair's envoy in Iraq, is quoted as saying of the US response, "No leadership, no strategy, no coordination, no structure and inaccessible to ordinary Iraqis."

Hmm, that sounds strangely similar to this administration's response to Katrina, as well as their execution of Medicare reform, and their plan for Social Security. I shudder to think what will occur if this administration faced an even larger challenge like say, an Avian Flu pandemic.

The voice of South Park's Chef, Isaac Hayes has decided to leave the show, citing religious intolerance. The timing of this is interesting, falling as it does shortly after the episode featuring Scientology(Hayes' faith) in a negative light aired. South Park has of course previously skewered Mormons, Jews, and Christians, without Mr. Hayes objecting in any way which suggests that he is perhaps overly thin skinned.
Besides Isaac, alien souls causing all human negative emotions, that is just asking to be mocked.
Take these chocolate salty balls and shove it!

Well this assumes Britney Spears could speak Spanish, which I'm guessing she can't. In fact her English seems only moderately passable, which means that it's better than Federline's. Anyway the point is Britney has put K-Fed on a budget. And listen to the bylines on his budget..."Each month, he will be allotted a certain amount of money for personal use - i.e., clothing, nightclubs, booze and day-to-day activities."
Yes, I know when I'm putting my monthly budget together, I need to make sure I got the booze and nightclubs covered(F--- food and shelter, necessities only people). Poor thing, first Britney's on the celebrity herpes list, now this indignity! Of course he shouldn't complain too vociferously, as Bill Maher says the only thing about K-Fed that actually works is his sperm.

Speaking of Britney, she is quickly cruising into the Kirstie Alley celebrity fitness category.
Ding Dong, man, Ding Dong.

This is interesting, the birthday calculator. It's finally fulfilled my burning desire to find out what my birth tree is. Oh, and I'm on life path 5. Apparently I ordered a number 5 off the existential super value menu in the sky. Big thanks to McD for the linkage.

Fantastic episode last night. I won't spoil it for those who Tivo'd and haven't seen it, but let's just say, you won't see that ending coming. Now the misery of it is, I have to wait a week to find out what will happen next. Sigh.
Did you take care of that thing?

I also watched the series premiere of Big Love, which looks like it will be another winner for HBO productions. As a male, the premise of three wives on a show automatically has some appeal, just imagine, three times the sex! Of course, what you soon also realize happens are 3 times the bills, 3 times the kids, and a host of bizarre relationship dynamics. It's well written and I recommend it to fans of HBO's other dramas.

Gossiplist.com has a list of celebrities who reportedly have herpes. I don't know whether any of this is actually true, though given some of the names on this list, I wouldn't be suprised.

A couple of things though, where's Michael "Ron Mexico" Vick, shouldn't he make a celebrity herpes list? Also if Pam Anderson is on the list shouldn't Tommy Lee be there as well? We all know they've had unprotected sex. And finally does this mean Tom Cruise now has herpes? Sort of brings whole new plot potential to Mission Impossible 4:Living the life I want.

It appears that after having already succeeded in alienating every clear thinking Democratic and Independent voter in America; that the President is now losing chunks of his base. As conservative commentor Bruce Bartlett (a former Reagan Administration official) says in the preceding article, "If I had a choice and Bush were running today against (Democratic President) Bill Clinton, I'd vote for Bill Clinton," "He was clearly a much better president in a great many ways that matter to me."
Yes, actual conservatives should be concerned with things like balanced budgets, economic prosperity at home, and peace abroad. Welcome to the reality based community Mr. Bartlett, better late than never. Just keep this in mind the next time you actually step into a voting booth.

Bartlett's not the only former Reagan official whose come to his senses either. Former Reagan Secretary of the Navy James Webb is running for the Senate in Virginia, as a Democrat.

1. Giants- A bolstered bench(added Jose Vizcaino, Mark Sweeney), and an improved rotation(welcome Matt Morris) are two major reasons to like San Francisco going into the new season. But the biggest reason to like the G-men(both literally and figuratively) wears number 25, swings lefty, and is only 47 HR away from being the all time leader. Adding a typical year of Barry Bonds production to the lineup would provide a huge lift and propel the Giants to the division title. Assuming of course he's not too distracted by the piles of needles he leaves in his wake.

Do I look like I'm on steroids? Wait, don't answer that.

2. Dodgers- The Dodgers have undergone an infield overhaul adding SS Rafael Furcal, 3B Bill Mueller and 1B Nomar Garciaparra(yes, that's right, he's playing 1B) to returnee Jeff Kent at 2B. These additions along with the terrific Dodger pitching have the folks in LALA land thinking division title. Personally I don't think the Dodgers have added enough offense to win it this year, but they will come close.

3. Rockies- Slowly but surely this team is turning into something interesting. After several seasons of last place finishes, opposing team's offensive explosions, and just general malaise; it appears Rockie fans will finally have something to cheer about. The nucleas of this team, SS Clint Barmes (27), 3B Garrett Atkins (26), RF Brad Hawpe (26), 2B Luis Gonzalez (26) and LF Matt Holliday (26) is the youngest in the division. The best player and senior member of the squad 1B Todd Helton is only 32 and remains one of the top hitters in baseball. Assuming everyone on this team makes the right amount of age appropriate improvement, this team may be the best in the division next year. For now they'll settle for a winning record.

4. Padres- The Padres on the other hand are going in the other direction. The traded 20 somethings Xavier Nady and Sean Burroughs in the off season; and brought in 3B Vinny Castilla (38) and CF Mike Cameron (33). That leaves Khalil Greene (26) as the only Padre regular below the age of 30. On the plus side the Padres do have Jake Peavy, who is the best pitcher in baseball that you've probably never heard of.
Geez, I only led the NL in strikeouts last year!

5. Diamondbacks-Remember when this team had Randy Johnson, Curt Schilling and won a World Series? Now they have Russ Ortiz, Javier Vasquez, and 25 games out in their sights, ouch. In addition, they traded their only real power hitter Troy Glaus this offseason for a collection of not much, so the offense shall suffer as well. On the plus side the D-backs did acquire catcher Johnny Estrada from the Braves, whose name lends itself nicely to a number of humorous C.Hi.P. S. references.

Get a hit, Ponch!